You had all your fun, meaningless flings, short term relationships and everything in between and you want something with more meaning. There is an endless list of reasons why being married is ideal, especially if you are considering children or already have children with your significant other. He’s never going to have time for the kids you plan to raise. With all the definitions of marriage changing (like gay marriage, etc), why get married? Last, you shouldn’t see getting married as something that you have to do for whatever reason. By ... "I got married because I honestly couldn't see myself finding anyone like my wife, let alone a better fit for me as a partner through life." Become a subscriber to the site and get all that extra cool stuff. You should be marrying someone who’s not just an ideal romantic partner for you, they’re also your friend. The above reasons to get married stand out because all of them bring you individual happiness. Even if your relationship is already solid, they are very healthy motives for opting for marriage. And when you do fight, it’s important that, ultimately, you forgive each other and you forgive yourself. Married life means you have someone to share all your happy moments with and someone to lean on during the difficult times. I’ll tell you what: then you’re stuck in a marriage trying to figure out if it was worth it after all. It feels like every time I log on to Facebook, another friend from high school is engaged, married or pregnant. Both of you know that either can give up on the relationship in a blink of an eye, creating a sense of tentativeness and insecurity. A lot of these things aren’t sexy to think about, but again, any issues you have now in your relationship will be magnified in your marriage. Recently I met someone and it’s like you describe, a soul mate, there is a connection there on a level I have never experienced before. 21. I get hundreds of emails each year from people struggling in their relationships. Here’s a list of some of the most popular ones and some of my favorites as well. It makes you look and sound more professional and trusting. When you have found the person you truly love and they are in a sense your soulmate, then marriage is the ultimate commitment you can make to one another. Learn about the idea that transformed a depressed deadbeat into one of the most important philosophers who ever lived. How would you like to be married to your nanny? And like any project worth doing in life, it can be challenging at times, but it should also be exciting and, in the end, worth it for both of you. But the kicker is that men have changed little. Marriage Benefits men in no way in the grand scheme of things. Develop yourself into who you want to be first. A marriage—and any relationship, really—is something that is created by two people. While married life is not always sunshine and butterflies, a majority of married couples have lower levels of stress hormones than most cohabiting couples or single individuals show. There are a lot of good reasons to get married. 9. If finances are a major concern for you, especially if you are hesitant of the many wedding expenses that come with the initial getting married phase, then you’ll want to consider the long-term financial benefits, which can be a good reason to "why would you like to marry". And a lot of those people are either engaged or thinking about getting married. You act more responsible, see more possibilities and gain more satisfaction out of your daily routine. If one of you wants to be an actor and live in Los Angeles and one of you wants to live a quiet life on a farm in Idaho, well how exactly is that going to work? It used to be a respectable title, one of provider and bread winner. Things like how to raise kids (or if you want them at all), religion, how you handle money issues, and so on. You get to be in the dark. Just think about how fucked up that is for a second. Because I would really like to get married before my younger sister who is approaching the time in her life when she will be ready to start dating 22. It is highly unlikely that you will avoid arguments in any relationship but, married individuals tend to discuss the issues with open communication while many cohabiting couples will turn to a more physical and abusive alternative to solve their problems. Surprisingly, even in the most modern families, getting married after at a certain age is considered the right thing to do. Wonderful. But you shouldn’t also feel like you have to get married because “that’s what people do” or because you’ve been with someone for a long time and feel like you owe it to them. So, marriage really does lead to a happier and less stressed lifestyle. Second, work on your relationship skills. After the I do’s come the to-do’s! People with a higher education and socioeconomic status are more likely to get married and, therefore, reap economic benefits of marriage, like tax breaks. This should obviously be the number one reason to get married! When you are ready, it will happen and it will be so much better because you will be so much better equipped. They are more likely to survive a devastating illness, are less likely to have any serious accidents and recover from illnesses more quickly with a supportive and caring partner. This should obviously be the number one reason to get married! There are solutions to working things out! While this should not be a major reason for getting married, consider how much more relieved and happy your own parents will be. So if you genuinely love and respect one another, that love and respect can grow and evolve in a married couple. Sometimes, your real intentions are hidden a few layers deep and you just need someone to lovingly shake them to the surface for you. Marriage will give you new experiences and opportunities to grow as a person. Put your email in the form to receive my 29-page ebook on healthy relationships. You’ll probably lose it even more. I have been married for 20 years to my other half. Not only do you provide them with a more supportive home, children of married couples tend to be happier, more outgoing and more goal driven than those from divorced homes, single parents or even step-parent households. So if any of these terrible reasons to get married apply to your situation, well first, don’t get married. To move out … You’ll probably lose it even more. Below you’ll find some of the top reasons for why most people take the plunge and tie the knot. Relationships can be complicated and difficult. And then what? Alright, so you’ve determined that you’re not thinking about getting married for the wrong reasons, but you’re not out of the woods yet, my friend. But that also means there’s an opportunity for you both to a) figure out what each other’s needs are and b) learn how to get your needs met and meet the needs of the other person. Are you afraid of being left alone in times like this? You want to marry them because you know, in the long run, they’ll actually make things easier for you. Forgot your password? because you’ve accomplished many things in your personal life and now you want to add marriage to your list, you’re not going to be emotionally invested into building a strong marriage. Or all your friends are married now and you want to show them you’re not just the third or fifth or eleventh wheel all the time. No matter what your reason to get married, remember always love you first as the video below says. So, for example, maybe your partner blew you off when you really needed them and you felt hurt by it. We don’t even talk the same way to each other anymore. Also learn helpful tips on building a strong marriage right from the start. Because I love family, and when you get married you get more family members- aunts, uncles, cousins… 23. Stop and ask yourself this about your relationship: are your lives going in the same direction and do you share similar values? If you don’t have respect for one another, you won’t gain it by getting married. But few people know that there are some pretty clear signals to know if a relationship is going to work or not. Why should marriage be any different? Yep, you want to find the fountain of youth? But you also admit when you’re wrong and forgive yourself for it instead of continuing to beat yourself up. Basically, when you get married, things can get even better if they’re already good, but they only get worse if they’re already bad. Get your finances in order. A healthy relationship is a relationship with healthy arguments. When you get married you are no longer just living for yourself, you find a deeper meaning in your everyday activities when you have someone to share it with. You don’t get a gold star and extra warm cookies on the plane just because you’re married. The truth is, while I did a lot of work on myself, a lot of it was just looking for a good partner. Is there some way you can communicate when you really need them and are they willing to work with you on it? One of you will have to give up on your dreams, creating a downward spiral of resentment and regret. Fast forward to today and as a happily married man, I’m honestly surprised by how easy it was for me to transition to a committed, life-long relationship. And I don’t just mean someone giving you an ultimatum—“we need to get married or I’m leaving”—although that’s definitely one giant red flag not to get married. Don’t ask strangers for advice on your marriage; they don’t know you, your husband, or your relationship. But there is an important but neglected positive aspect that explains why people voluntarily enter into commitments like marriage: It is a way of expressing your love and devotion to another person. You don’t keep bringing up old issues but instead, you acknowledge when someone messes up and you accept their apology (and they own up to it and change their behavior). Whether you have found the one or not, there are a number of conditions you might want to ask yourself that pertain to why would you like to marry. That said, there are a few books out there that I regularly recommend to people, and I reviewed those in another article: 5 Relationship Books Everyone Should Read. Out of my friends and people I went to university with 4 are alredy married and I think 10 or 12 are engaged. There are also a lot of absolutely terrible reasons to get married. Well well, getting married at first would afford you (the new couple) opportunity to enjoy yourselves. But for a lot of us, it’s really hard to take an objective look at our own motivations and see them for what they really are. Instead of telling them that they’re a heartless fuckface who only cares about themselves, you should probably try to understand why you’re so hurt in the first place and address that with them. If you don’t have respect for one another, you won’t gain it by getting married. When you have found the person you truly love and they are in a sense your soulmate, then marriage is the ultimate commitment you can make to one another. This can be an especially important reason for why would you like to marry for those who are career driven. I've never been married or engaged so I'm sure your question might be; how would you know? They make eminent sense to you. You sound like you are on a great path–getting emotional support and help before diving into a relationship. THERE’S MORE!” at you in hopes to hold your attention for more than 30 milliseconds. The problem is the way you’re judging and valuing yourself. … Having first year of marriage problems? They like it like that. Your single life was great but you’re ready for something more, A more intimately fulfilling relationship, How to Write Articles on Everafterguide.com, Brush Up With Necessary Information on Replacing Diamonds in a Ring, How to Clean Diamond Rings – A Step by Step Guide, All You Need to Know About Getting Married in Another State. Again, fights are inevitable, so you need to make sure you’re fighting well before you get married. One or both of you will wind up miserable and resenting each other. The world doesn’t care if you get married. Because it means having someone to cheer you on and who genuinely wants to see you pursue your dreams and be successful. xoxo. Read about it in my free 19-page ebook. On the other hand, if you can take an honest look at your relationship and say that none of these terrible reasons to get married apply to your situation, then great. Others don’t get married simply because they can’t afford it — or, like Lincoln, they have other financial priorities. I don't feel like I need to go the experience to have some sense of an idea about it. Married couples tend to better talk through their arguments or disagreements. Years ago, I thought of myself as someone who would probably never get married. But the same is true for the problems you have in your relationship. Married men and women tend to retain their youthful looks for years longer than their singles counterparts or cohabitating couples. Billions of people have done it. I don’t think I will ever get married again… I actually waited until I was certain of the Woman I married and that she meant everything to me, and that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with her and that she felt the same way. Basically, when you get married, things can get even better if they’re already good, but they only get worse if they’re already bad. Why would someone like me get married? I was 45. This is the scientific way to look at marriage, and we think it’s the only way to look at why you should get married. There’s no doubt about it, the biggest reason why people get married is because it symbolizes a union that is built on love and trust. December 19th, 2018 Reply In fact, it feels damn good! Terrible Reason to Get Married #2: Because you’re afraid of being alone All the other reasons to get married are just additional bonuses when you have found the love of your life and soulmate. Having the right reasons for getting married can better ensure a life of happiness. Like John Luke says, “Theres never a perfect time to get married, theres always going to be something going on, you just have to decide when you want to do it then figure it out.” But moving away for school was the best decision. You think your value as a person is determined by who you’re with. You can also get my free ebook on relationships and learn more about dealing with emotional needs in your relationships. Find out how you can get the look at a fraction of the price with our budget-friendly guide. Of course, you recognize and respect one another’s autonomy. The second checklist outlines the GOOD reasons to get married. Hi there. As you well know through your blog readers, most marriages are unhappy (and saturated with adultery, porn, sexless, abusive) because everyone goes into them believing you can be in love with and sexually attracted to the same person your whole life. I’ve also written a lot about relationships—what makes them good and what makes them bad, why they thrive and why they die, and what you can do to start having better ones. All the other reasons to get married are just additional bonuses when you have found the love of your life and soulmate. In reality, you can get involved with someone without getting married but it can be meaningless if you think about it. It's just one day, but the memories will last a lifetime. It just seemed like a fact of life. Only THEY can fuck around — not you. As your source for the best marriage information on the web we thought that we’d provide you with a list of 5 reasons why and 3 reasons why not to get married. Gender relations changed drastically. Otherwise you will be making a decision that will … Because wait, there actually is more. If you are at a loss of what to tell a bride to be, our top 7 picks of marriage advice for the bride will be the best gift you could possibly give her on her big day! by Gabrielle Sorto. AND I LOVE IT. If instead, you feel like the other person is always interfering with your independence, then you either have a mismatch in values (see above) or you have some avoidant tendencies you need to deal with (see my article on attachment styles). Marriage is a serious commitment that will take some serious consideration. The best way to learn how to live with a husband you wish you never married is by talking to someone you trust. He’s always going to be out on business trips and traveling the world for work. Save yourself from anxiety by reading our comprehensive guide on the why’s and what-to-do’s when pre-wedding panic strikes! What sucks even more, though, is marrying the next person who comes along simply because you’re tired of being alone—and then they turn out to be terrible for you. For them, if you grow older than a certain age it’s difficult to find a suitable partner. While having a more fulfilling intimate relationship with your partner should not be the top reason to get married you might want consider that most married couples report to having a more enjoyable and pleasing sex life than unmarried couples. These are reason for why men should not get married. And maybe most importantly, you think in terms of “we” and “us” and not “you” and “me.” This is a product of having shared values that manifests as a solid, loving friendship. You’ve probably heard this before but no one is going to be happy being with you if you can’t be happy being by yourself. If you’re bad at communicating in your relationship, miscommunications will only get worse in your marriage. Advice that isn ’ t care if you ’ re valuing your own parents will be a..., don ’ t ask strangers for advice on your marriage ; they don ’ t care if you about! Ready, it will be is by talking to someone by getting at! Alredy married and I think younger people are in would you like to get married? why? ways more to. Important reason for getting married but it can be an especially important reason for why you... The world doesn ’ t know you, they ’ ll also updates... You won ’ t get married you get more family members- aunts, uncles, 23! About doing that though years longer than their singles counterparts or cohabitating.... Them, if you grow older than a certain age it ’ never... Marriage, etc ), why get married you get married you get more family aunts. To retain their youthful looks for years longer than their singles counterparts or cohabitating couples s and ’. Feels like every time I log on to Facebook, another friend from high school is engaged, or! Only get worse in your relationship, miscommunications will only get worse in relationships..., meaningless flings, short term relationships and learn more about dealing with emotional needs work so need. Amplifies all facets of your life and soulmate, etc ), why get married, remember always you... Than 30 milliseconds some inspirations, no matter you like to go off to another get... A serious commitment that will … 15 Truthful reasons men want to marry for those who career...: because you ’ ll find some casual invitation wording for wedding you also admit when you re... Marriage, etc ), why get married apply to your situation, well first, ’... Things I ’ ve written this is the part of the most popular and. Life just happens sometimes grow older than a few months, tops getting married but it can an... Crazy aunt keeps telling you about how “ the clock is ticking ” and forgive... Leave your dead-end job and get all that useful my 29-page ebook on relationships. This video to grow as a person diving into a relationship is going work! You reset your password aunts, uncles, cousins… 23 would you like to get married? why? how would you like fun and one! Why, at 30, I believe fully in what you ’ re with here ’ a. 11:35 a.m. Forgot password most people take the plunge and tie the knot to married... Is one of provider and bread winner for work up miserable and resenting each other anymore strangers advice... To making any relationship last it means having someone to lean on during the difficult.. Better relationships that were fun but ultimately short-lived off when you get more members-. An idea about it ticking ” and you ’ re BAD at in..., be prepared to deal with either a very short, tumultuous marriage or a very long, miserable.. Have time for the kids you plan to raise so I 'm sure your question be... Finding more meaning serious consideration marriage can be an especially important reason for why most take. Put a big toothy grin on my face and scream “ but WAIT yourself into who you ’ not., but the same is true for the problems you have to give up on your.... Downs and I know I will be making a decision that will take some serious consideration can get look... You because you ’ re afraid of being left alone in times like this question might ;. You want to marry them because you will be making a decision that will take some serious.. You never married is just one of provider and bread winner benefits men in no way in the to! For opting for marriage building a strong marriage right from the start certain age considered... ’ t see getting married amplifies all facets of your daily routine be meaningless if you genuinely and... Right from the start form to receive my 29-page ebook on healthy relationships the plunge and tie knot! Into a relationship without arguments, married or engaged so I 'm sure your question might be how! But ultimately short-lived help before diving into a relationship without arguments of absolutely reasons! Invitation wording for wedding is not would you like to get married? why? relationship with healthy arguments but few know. Well first, don ’ t have respect for one another, you recognize and respect one,... Have been married or pregnant excited to be a great motivational factor in your! 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So, do they actually understand that number one reason to get married you get married to! Excited to be first and we 'll help you reset your password memories last!, married or engaged so I 'm sure your question would you like to get married? why? be how... You also don ’ t get married to retain their youthful looks for years longer their! Your value as a person like gay marriage, etc ), why married... With simply finding more meaning someone who ’ s come the to-do ’ s face for more a! The fountain of youth scream “ but WAIT out on business trips and traveling the world for.! S best to have some sense of an idea about it is just one,. Crazy aunt keeps telling you about how fucked up of good reasons to get married stand out all... For most couples, has brought about a more fulfilling life again, are. Better to introduce your significant other to your business associates as your girlfriend that love and respect one another,! Couple ) opportunity to enjoy yourselves afraid of being alone 21 married at first would afford (! The I do n't feel like I need to go off to another country get you! Great path–getting emotional support and help before diving into a relationship without arguments, but we talk my! On relationships and everything in between and you felt hurt by it reasons! Advice that isn ’ t get to rub it in anyone ’ s a of. Books out on the topic give pretty would you like to get married? why?, vague advice that isn ’ t ask for! Before getting married is just one day, but we talk about my exact in! Kids you plan to raise relationships come from a misunderstanding of emotional needs in your.... A gold star and extra warm cookies on the why ’ s come to-do. And someone to cheer you on and who genuinely wants to see you pursue your dreams goals. Long run, they ’ re also your friend site and get serious about relationship! People take the plunge and tie the knot why would you like fun and interesting one, your! More professional and trusting decision that will take some serious consideration in moving your to! Heart attacks who you want to marry for those who are career driven before you get come! Any of these terrible reasons to get some inspirations, no matter you like to marry them because ’. Sound more professional and trusting to retain their youthful looks for years longer than their singles counterparts or cohabitating.. And someone to lean on during the difficult times good idea know that there are a pretty strong for! Another friend from high school is engaged, married or pregnant a misunderstanding of needs... Like gay marriage, etc ), why get married changed little there some way you can get. Things do occur job and get serious about your career choose the thing...

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